In just a few days we will celebrate your 4th birthday. We have been counting down the days to your 4th birthday since the middle of March. I love your excitement and your specific birthday requests. Like how you want fake flowers instead of real ones for your birthday so that they don’t have to stay in water and you can play with them whenever you’d like. And how you really, really, really wanted a piñata for your birthday ( I have no idea where that came from). And the fact that you wanted to invite every girl in the whole city to your birthday party, so as not to leave anyone out. These oh so detailed and very specific requests reflect exactly who you are. From the moment I was pregnant with you and there were complications in the beginning, I knew you were a fighter. And when you came into this world 2 weeks early and less than 30 minutes of arriving at the hospital, I knew that you would be independent and want to do things your way. Your smile, it’s contagious. It lights up a whole room and leaves people in a stupor wondering what just happened to them. Simply put my dear, you are magic.
Tonight as I was putting you to bed, I asked you, “What are you Gwendolyn Grayce?” You shyly answered back, “I don’t know,” knowing full well that you do, but I told you anyway. I spoke over you the same words I have spoken over you since the day you were born, that you are…Kind, Strong, Beautiful and Worth it. At the end you smiled and said confidently, “I AM!” These words are your banner, they are your song for when you have forgotten your way or who you are. I will continue to speak these four words over you until I have no breath left in me.
You are Kind. It’s written all over your face and your heart already exudes a tender kindness. I see it when you offer up your favorite snack, because your brother or sister had their heart set on it. I feel it when you tell me how much you love me on a daily basis. And I know it deep in my bones when I see your heart break for others even at such a young age.
You are Strong. My dear, your namesake, my Nana was one of the strongest women I know. You have her DNA coursing through your veins. May that give you a sense of pride and undeniable strength. You are Miss Independent and a times strong-willed, but I champion that because I know one day you will use those characteristics as a strength to change the world.
You are Beautiful. You really are breathtaking. Sometimes I’ll catch a glimpse of you with your wild and messy hair, hard at work making pretend “soup” or drawing a picture and it will literally take my breath away. But baby girl, hear me when I say this, beauty isn’t determined by a number or a size or even from having a flawless face. Beauty comes from within and manifests itself outwards to every part of you. Kindness is beauty. Strength is beauty. Having an unshakable knowledge of who you are is beauty. Believe that and know that always.
You are worth it. There will come a time when something or someone will make you question your worth. It will shake you to your core and make you question everything you believe about yourself and the world around you. You may not understand this now, but hang on to these words…You are worth it. Not just because your Dad and I believe that but because Jesus deemed you worthy long before you were ever a thought in our minds or a dream in our hearts. He paid the ultimate price for you. He says you are worth it and don’t ever believe anything less. You are worth it. You are always worth it.
Love you sweet girl! I am humbled and honored to be your Mama. Happy 4th Birthday!